Mon, 05/03/2010 - 19:56
A controversial study conducted by the DUC (Dokora University in Cairo) has revealed that Egypt’s underground gay community suffers from homophobia.
The study has also confirmed that, despite government figures, there may be more than 15 homosexuals in Egypt, and even more outside of prisons.
However, lead researcher Mido Libeedo said that due to strong cultural conditioning, even gays in Egypt could not help having a fear and intense dislike of gays.
“There’s just something so gay about gay people,” said closet gay man Amoor Kiko. He bumped the tips of his two index fingers together while shaking his head in disapproval. “It just doesn’t work,” he said.
Mr. Kiko’s boyfriend, who’s officially only his “anteem,” said that it’s one thing for them to cuddle while watching Titanic together, but another thing completely to give in to their repressed desires. “That would just be gay,” he said, disgusted.
“In effect, this shows that Egypt’s gay community is composed of homophobic homos,” Libeedo explained.
Other gay Egyptians interviewed in the study insisted that they were not gay so long as they were never on the receiving end.
“I must have ‘da2eit’ 30 men in my life time,” said Howana Baddibas to EKT, “that’s how macho I am.”
Baddibas proudly claims that no one has ever approached his backside during any of his escapades. “Are you crazy? Do you think like, I’m gay or what?” he retorted when EKT questioned him on the matter.
“I mean, ya3333,” he added.
One of the study’s recommendations to help Egyptian gays accept their identity, was the employment of a more precise use of the slang term for gay – “fag”, or Kha&%$ in Arabic.*
Currently, the word is the 2nd most used in the Egyptian Arabic language (after “vagina” and “mother”, which are tied at 1st place), and is often used to refer to anyone from individuals with low IQs, to vegetarians, left-handed men, lisp speakers, and men who refuse to kiss other men on the cheeks.
“Now, those are the real fags,” said Baddibas while absent-mindedly jiggling the earlobe of one of EKT’s male correspondents.
For the Egyptian government, the Minister of Sexual Deviance, Balash Sha2awa, has agreed that the public definition of “fag” needs to be more precise, but has also proposed that anti-Mubarak campaigners should be included in whatever new definition the term takes on.
Sha2awa argued that “nothing is more gay than people who refuse to bend over to the current regime.” He added that “people who constantly whine about poor living conditions and manly, authoritarian governments are totally homo.”
Using a mocking, effeminate voice, Sha2awa made fun of demonstrators: “‘Ohh, I want better health care. Ohh, I want fair elections. Ohh, I want a decent minimum wage …’" He concluded: "Ya3ni if that’s not gay, I don’t know what is.”
*Please note that EKT has censored the term “kha&%$,” as most Egyptian find the use of “khawal” in a formal context to be offensive.
*Please also note that female gays were not investigated in the study, as the (all-male/dokora) research group suffered from distracting arousals whenever interviews with lesbians were attempted.