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Science and Technology

Egypt at Copenhagen: "We will reduce our gas emissions by banning foul consumption"

Written by EKT Team Dec 16th, 2009
Saturday, 19th of December, 2009

As the Copenhagen Climate Conference comes to an inconclusive end, Egypt has stood out amongst the global community as willing to sacrifice its most beloved staple food, foul, in the name of combating climate change. “Foul is a menace to the climate,” said Farid Lafasya, head of the Forbidding Flatulence Committee in Faisal Street. “The amount of gas passed from Egyptian bottoms thanks to foul each day is...

Technology to End Starvation

Written by Subar Lox Nov 8th, 2009
Sunday, 8th of November, 2009

The Egyptian government has decided to begin selling virtual bread to alleviate some of the stress on those less fortunate starting January 2010. Although virtual bread cannot neccessarily be eaten, studies show that the image of a freshly baked, steaming loaf of baladi bread can go a long distance in alleviating some of the mental stress associated with a lack of basic human living conditions. Scandanavian experts...

Destroy The Butterflies

Written by Subar Lox Oct 27th, 2009
Sunday, 25th of October, 2009

We're all familiar with the phrase The Butterfly Effect. Indeed, many have had the misfortune of seeing the film named after it. The idea is that a butterfly flapping its wings in Bangladesh could lead to a tidal wave in Japan, or to note a well documented example: when Queen Elizabeth sneakily passed gas during tea time in 1989, it culminated in the current financial crisis. Familiar as you might be with the...

The Planet is Round!

Written by Makarona Oct 23rd, 2009
Friday, 23rd of October, 2009

After billions of Egyptian pounds and years of investigations, the National Research Center (NRC) has finally concluded: “Yes, the Earth is round!” “It’s as we feared,” said leader researcher Dr. Timmy El Katkoot, “the world is not flat!” Despite repeated reassurances from other countries of the world that the planet was in fact round, the NRC was adamant “not to just believe in anything anyone says,” as Dr. Katkoot...

"Bread is dangerous!"

Written by Makarona Oct 20th, 2009
Tuesday, October 20th, 2009

The Good Food for Every Egyptian Center has recently unveiled disturbing study results that paint a dire picture of bread. The baked mix of flour and water has been found to be consumed by more than 97% of convicted criminals, with more than 90% of crimes committed within 24 hours of consuming it. Lead researcher Haseb Khayeb stated “that bread is now being found to cause many of the problems we see in modern...